Social interactions have always been an interesting thing fo..
Added 2021-07-04 02:20:01 +0000 UTCSocial interactions have always been an interesting thing for me. I seem to feel like a walking contradiction. Because- I crave connection, I crave friendships, I crave understanding… yet sometimes I’ll have this lil fucker called anxiety which constantly tries to overpower any of those good things with fear, worry and not feeling good enough.
It’s frustrating. Because I will be excited to make new friends, or even just m33t up with current pals, yet my mind & body tell me to run, they say I’m not worthy of their love, and it can make me feel so sick that I have anxiety attacks. I’ve been working so hard on overcoming this and kindly & patiently teaching my mind & body not to fear social interactions (and diving deeper into the WHY, I feel that way) and it’s been so wonderful- but last night I broke down. Before my friends came over I just broke down in tears, I wanted to run & hide… So instead, I sat with myself & felt the sadness, I allowed the tears and felt the feels butttt then I cranked on some music and JAMMED my lil heart out … which is what I’m sharing here 😄 and I swear to goodness it helps me work through it all so much! I then had a beautiful night with friends… and what do ya know… none of those thoughts that the lil devil on my shoulder was trying to convince me were true. 🤦♀️🥺😅
